Sunday, January 25, 2009

4 strikes and you're cleaning the kitchen

I sat down to eat lunch yesterday and started to think about the behaviors of my children lately. I grabbed my notebook and started taking notes.

I want my children to be...
Self Reliant
Aware of needs around them
Happy and to have fun
Temple Worthy and to make good decisions
Reverent during Family Home Evening, Family Council, Scripture Study, and Prayer Time
Positive and to make the best of their situations
Willing to try new food
Mindful of their manners/Use good manners
Respectful to adults...and everyone
Constantly Learning

Behaviors I don't like...

Pulling Hair
Mean Talk
Excluding Siblings
Throwing Toys
Refusing to help or work
Whining (Especially when Matt is trying to help one of them...mostly Zach...when they'd rather have me do it)
Being a Tattle Tale

I want my kids to know that I love them.
We need to have the Spirit in our home.
I have been allowing too much TV/Computer/Nintendo time, especially for Zach and Kate.
I need to do a better job of letting the kids help more with cooking and cleaning.
I want my kids to know that life is not fair.
There is a time to work and there is a time to play.
Our choices have consequences.
I don't want children or any of us yelling from room to room to get someone's attention. Go to the person and talk with them.
When it's time to leave somewhere, it's time to leave.period.
I appreciate Zoe checking the mail for me after school.
I appreciate the great cleaner Emily is.

I went over my notes and thoughts during Family Council this evening. I felt the need for a change in our family. A change for the better to be consistent with what I want my kids to be. We needed a plan. A plan that Matt and I would be willing to be consistent with together. A plan for Zoe, Emily, and Eleanor and a plan for Zach and Kate. The older girls will get a strike for each bad choice that they make. 4 strikes earns them a chore, most likely cleaning up the kitchen before bedtime. Each day starts new with zero strikes. They each went to bed this evening with 3 strikes. Zach and Kate will stand in the corner after a bad choice. Something about standing outside and going in the diaper pail was mentioned if they refused to stand in the corner, but I plan to stick with the corner. They each went into the corner twice. If the kids go from Sunday to Sunday without 4 strikes on any day then we will do a fun family activity during the next week. The older girls really liked that idea. I'm feeling good about our plan. :-)

Noah is clapping! He likes the plan, too.


Anonymous said...

Mum and Dad used to do plans like that ... only more Nazi-ish.

Kris said...

That sounds like a good plan! I love your list of what you do want your kids to be like, and what you want for your family. It is always good to focus on the positive & the goals, not just what's not working at the moment! I hope everyone makes it without four strikes this week... I bet they will. You have such good kids.

Gabriela said...

Sounds like a good plan-and if they misbehave you win by getting the kitchen cleaned up! Let us know how it goes long term (I'm always looking for a new plan!)

Dawn said...

Good ideas. Kristen and you could really compare notes. Consistency is the key - and so hard.

Janae said...

I love all your lists and plan! It is so hard to remain proactive sometimes in the kid behavior issues! You definitely gave me good ideas of things we should be working on too:)